All right soldiers fall in! And start marching!
Uhm okay we might need a little work.
We are being inundated with trolls and non believers! They are sending blurry pics like the one below to People and other tabs and they are buying into it.
Your Sargent has seen the original picture in the print magazine and it's not much clearer. Supposedly this is Rob and Dylan Penn is behind him putting her arms around him.
NO there is no one behind him . Follow your eyesight and you can see where the arm is coming from the sleeve of the man in the picture.
They are taking twitter sightings and changing the details. Brunettes have turned into blondes. And Blondes have turned into brunettes. Dylan Penn is a blonde one moment and a brunette in the next. What ever fits the twitter sighting they are going with at the moment.
She was blonde at the Emmys.
Now supposedly there was a sighting of Rob with a brunette after the Emmys. Yeah explain that one dipshidiots.
Waiting Waiting.....
Their way of explaining all the brunette sightings that before they took as fact? She was brunette before the Emmys and dyed her hair blonde especially for the Emmys.
Okay then.
Now the People article stated "a pattinson source" told them this epic news. And according to the dipshidiots this means Rob and /or his rep Nick Frenkel.
No. it does not . It would say his rep confirmed if that was the case. And secondly Rob and /or his rep would never ever say anything about his personal life to People or any other tab.
The dipshidots will try and sway you with the argument that all the other tabs are reporting it too. This is a diversionary tactic soldiers! Don't fall for it!
They are doing nothing but using the copy and paste feature on their computer screen.
Lets look at this one more time soldiers .
If there is such epic love where is it in this picture? No Where. Normally when you are boyfriend and girlfriend you are sitting close together.
Oh say like this.
Or this.
Normally you would at least hold hands.
Oh say like this.
Or this
Hey even a kiss or two.
Like this.
Or this
Or this
Hey at this point even him looking at her and smiling like he means it would do.
Oh like this
Or this
Bringing her a towel and a drink after her swim would be an added bonus.
So they have been together for two months and the only pic is a blurry fan pic? Rolando must be slipping.
One of our dedicated soldiers played a ruse on People :
Hello,
My name is XXXX, I'm a friends with Dylan. I don't know where did you get this report but they are not dating. Just thought you'd like to know that.
Thanks,
XXXX
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PEOPLE:
Hi XXXX,
Thanks for writing in. We pride ourselves on reporting what's true, so I appreciate your time. Could you help us set the record straight- why you're so sure they're not dating, are they just friends? I just need a little more to go on since we do hear they are dating.
Thanks again!
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Hi,
I'm not sure who gave you that info but it's not true... Dylan is a close friend, she read your post & laughed... As far as I know they are not related at all.. I don't know who gave you the info but it's not true at all
Thanks,
XXXX
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PEOPLE:
By not related, you mean they don't even know each other?
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I never heard her talking about him before .... Perhaps they met because I know her dad worked with Robs girlfriend or ex girlfriend a few years ago
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PEOPLE:
Oh gotcha! How long have you known her for? Would you say Rob isn't even her type which is why she was laughing about it? Or do you or Dylan have any idea why the rumors even started?? I saw online they were at Viper Room earlier this month...guessing that was just a friendly outing then (which is totally allowed!)
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I know her for 15 years I think , since childhood ... I don't think he's her type to be honest but she was laughing because she didn't understand from where did those rumors came. She doesn't know why it started, she said that she knows there are always many rumors about him but she never expected to be in the middle of it
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PEOPLE:
Ha! Well I'm glad she can laugh about it...it must be weird to have the spotlight on her suddenly.
How did you guys become friends? And since you've known her for so long, how would you describe her (very nice and down to earth, etc) and what is usually her type so I can help explain how weird the dating rumors are? By the way, I think she is so gorgeous- just like her mom!
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Well, my dad used to be a good friend of her dad (they are not so close now but we stayed friends). We kind of grew up together, I'm a bit older so I'm kind of the big sister to her
She is prettier in real life than you see her in pics, very down to earth which is surprising because she was raised by famous parents. She's just 22 so not sure I can define her exact type, she dated different guys but I do know she prefers guys who are not from Hollywood in order to keep her own sanity but in general I think she likes good boys , she's not looking for the bad guy... Really sweet girl
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PEOPLE:
She sounds like a great girl...did she seem upset about the report? I actually have a friend who also went to Marin a couple years ago...I read somewhere Dylan went to USC for college- do you know if that's true?
And so cool you two have stayed friends through so many years. That's so rare! Is your dad also in the entertainment industry too?
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I don't think she was upset but she wasn't feeling comfortable with it for sure.. She was surprised really.
If I'm not mistaken she went to USC that is correct..
My dad is a businessman ... Not entertainment , we also lived many years in Germany but now I'm back in LA
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PEOPLE:
Oh that's amazing! How long have you been back in LA? Are you working out here now too?
Do you think it's possible Rob wants to date her and that's where the rumors are coming from...? Every media outlet is reporting that they've been dating casually for two months now so it's a little crazy if none of it is true...but maybe it's just he's been talking to his friends about her for awhile now so they think there's something going on?
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I'm here for 6 months now, starting to look for a job, needed time to settle
I don't think so.. She did tell me that her dad said Rob never shares things with people that spread rumor .. As I said she was surprised & to be honest I emailed just you because I know that People Mag is the most reliable media outlet, I know you don't deal with rumors but only with facts so I thought I should let you know... I know nothing about his side but from what I know from Dylan it makes no sense
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PEOPLE:
I'm really glad you reached out to us. We do want to get things right so if I hear anything else I will run it by you and see what you think. And just so you have it, my cell is XXX-XXX-XXXX. Feel free to text/call me if you see anything else you think might not be completely right on any site/magazine this weekend.
Good luck job hunting! I know it can be tough- if I can help with anything let me know.
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As you can see, we all can be sources. They have no idea what they're talking about. If you think I was clever- just think how can AP & Poopscoop fool them. Might want to make you rethink if other things (different break up announcements etc.) are actually reliable... !
Oh really now? So called truth sayer People doesn't sound too sure of their source in this email conversation do they soldiers. This Soldier deserves a promotion!
Any soldier trying to flop flop, cause doubt, fraternize with the enemy, or go awol out of this chicken outfit will be sent automatically to the stockade!
Your next assignment. Start learning how to knit or crochet to make those pink or blue booties!
All right ladies. Done for today. At ease.
Woah! Not that at ease! Corporal Sash! Keep your soldiers under control! It's not party time just yet! Private Okie you are in direct violation!
Go Tribe!!!!!!!! Woot Woot!